You are what you believe you are

I have spent SO long believing absolute rubbish about myself. Here are some of the beliefs I’ve carried around with me for my whole life that I’ve shifted out of and that I am still working on disproving.

I’m the stupid one in the family, I’m not academic, I have to work hard to get good outcomes/grades, I’m lazy, I’m disorganised, I’m not business minded, I’m messy, I’m forgetful, I’m fat, I’m unattractive, no one likes me, I’m annoying, I lack confidence, I’m shy, I can’t stick at anything, I’m not clever enough, I don’t know enough, I’m not enough. The list could go on. This could be a list true for a lot of people.

I’ve lived with these beliefs for my whole life because they are things I’ve been told repeatedly by others and to myself and I have believed them to be true, even though deep down I know that they’re absolute bullshit. And here’s how I know none of them are true and if some are partly then they aren’t fixed and I don’t need to keep telling myself the same story.

I’m not stupid, I’m actually really smart, It’s just I only have interest in the things I really enjoy learning about, I am academic I have got a 2:1 degree which I got A’s in some of my academic writing, which actually I throughly enjoy , I love reading journal articles and writing about what I learn. I have never revised a day in my life (despite people thinking I tried hard, I never have and probably could have done even better if I did try) not that makes me more valuable and enough. I am pretty confident in my abilities, but then I will always question myself and then not bother speaking up which then makes me lack confidence in what I am saying. I’m not shy, I just take time to learn if it’s safe to be myself around people. I can stick at things that are fun and excite me and things that give me room to learn and grow and then it's time for me to move on., It’s just how I work. (who says you have to stick to one thing anyway)?! I’ve started and run a couple of successful businesses and I always am looking to work towards growing something new. People do like me, I have friends. I can be messy and disorganised sometimes and other times I can be the opposite. It's just how I operate, I’m ok with it.

Anyway, the point being is you need to find out what beliefs you’re subconsciously running on and then to find evidence of them being untrue and find the evidence, that what you really believe and know is true about yourself. Work on them daily and keep taking steps to build the confidence and new beliefs so they become the new subconscious program that you run on. Why would you want to change these? For me, because I want more out of this life I have and I don’t want things that aren’t true to stop me doing well or stop me being my whole self, out of fear that I’m these things and others will think them too. Re write your story and you beliefs you hold about yourself.